Skip to main content

Chaos Is My Comfort Zone

What If I’m Just Not Wired That Way?

Do you ever feel like the world wasn’t designed for the way you operate? I do. A lot.

What if I’m just not a planner? What if I don’t want to live my life more than a week—or even a day—at a time? Is that okay? Can I still succeed, thrive, and build a life that works for me, even if it doesn’t look like the Pinterest-perfect, color-coded schedule everyone else seems to have?

A Question of Wiring

There’s a lot of pressure in life to fit into certain molds. Be punctual. Be organized. Plan ahead. But what if I’m the kind of person who thrives in the moment? What if I work better on the fly? What if I’m always running a little late—not because I’m lazy or disrespectful, but because my brain genuinely feels more alive when there’s a hint of chaos to it all?

For a long time, I thought something was wrong with me. “Why can’t you just be more organized?” I’d ask myself. “Why can’t you plan better? Why does it feel so unnatural to schedule things weeks or months in advance?”

But here’s the truth I’ve come to: I’m not wired that way. And maybe, just maybe, that’s not a bad thing.

Chaos Is My Comfort Zone

Some people find peace in structure; I find comfort in chaos. I don’t mean the kind of chaos where life is falling apart, but the kind that feels alive and unpredictable. It’s in those moments that I feel creative, inspired, and fully myself.

I’ve learned that I often create chaos—not to make life harder, but because it’s where I thrive. When things are too neat, too rigid, too perfectly planned, I feel suffocated. I lose the spark that makes me, well, me.

Can the World Work for Me?

Here’s the big question: Can I design a life that honors the way I’m wired, rather than trying to change who I am to fit into a world of planners, organizers, and early birds?

Could I create a business that runs on pop-up events and last-minute bookings? Could I embrace the idea of only committing to things a week in advance and just let the rest go?

I think the answer is yes. It might not be conventional, but who says success has to look a certain way?

Letting Go of the Need for Approval

The hardest part of this journey isn’t figuring out logistics or how to make my lifestyle work—it’s letting go of the need for others to approve of it. Not everyone will understand why I show up 10 minutes late or why I don’t have my calendar planned out six months in advance. And that’s okay.

What I’m learning is that it’s not about expecting the world to accept me as I am; it’s about accepting myself. Once I do that, the rest doesn’t matter as much.

The Beauty of Being Me

So, what if I’m just not wired that way?
What if I’m a little late, a little messy, and a little chaotic?

Maybe that’s not a flaw to fix but a part of who I am to embrace. Maybe my superpower isn’t in fitting into the world’s mold but in breaking it altogether.

And maybe, just maybe, the world doesn’t need another perfectly planned-out person. Maybe it needs someone who thrives in the unpredictability of the moment—someone who shows that there’s more than one way to live, love, and create a life that works.

If you’ve ever felt like you don’t fit, maybe it’s not you who needs to change. Maybe it’s time to build a life that fits you instead.

And for me? I’m learning to let go of the guilt and lean into who I am. Late, chaotic, and unapologetically me.

What about you?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Struggle for Balance: A Journey of Acceptance and Surrender

Lately, I've found myself in a completely freaked-out state, feeling like I'm in full alarm mode when things seem off. It's a familiar cycle for me, and it's often why I write about balance, acceptance, and surrender. The truth is, these are the very things I need to hear myself. Even though the words pour out onto the page, they don't always resonate with me as deeply as I'd like. If it's just a "meh" kind of day, I can usually quiet the voices telling me that I  need  to figure out what's going on with me. But after that, the spiral begins. I go into "fix-it" mode, asking myself what I need to change in my life. Then come the impulsive decisions, radical restrictions, and a meticulously crafted plan to regain control. Impulsive Decisions: A Quick Dopamine Hit For me, impulsive decisions are anything that gives me a quick dopamine hit. It might be shopping, signing up for a new class, race, or activity—anything that feels like it wil...
Post a Comment
Read more

Face the Fire: Why the Toughest Challenges Are the Ones You Need Most

The Hard Truth: The Most Important Run is the One You Don’t Want to Do Let’s cut the fluff. Life isn’t about doing what’s easy or comfortable. It’s about facing the tough stuff head-on—the things you’d rather avoid, the things that push you to your limits. So, let’s talk about the truth you probably don’t want to hear: the most important run is the one you don’t want to do. The Run You Dread: Where the Real Work Happens You know that run you keep putting off? The one that makes you groan just thinking about it? That’s the run that matters most. When you lace up your shoes and every cell in your body screams, “Not today!”—that’s the exact moment you need to step up. It’s not just about physical endurance; it’s about mental toughness. It’s about proving to yourself that you can push through, even when every part of you wants to quit. That’s where the real work happens. When you conquer that run, you’re not just winning a battle against the pavement—you’re winning a battle against yoursel...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Truth About Marathon Running: It's Not Easy for Any of Us

One thing I find myself reminding new marathoners time and time again is this: running is hard for all of us. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been running for years or if you’re lacing up your sneakers for the first time. The challenge is real, and it’s something every runner faces. There’s a common misconception that "real" runners—those who have completed multiple marathons or seem to have endless energy—somehow find it easier. Maybe it looks like we wake up every morning eager to hit the pavement, with a natural drive and enthusiasm that makes the miles fly by effortlessly. But let me tell you, that couldn’t be further from the truth. The reality is, running is tough. There are days when even the most seasoned runners struggle to find the motivation to get out the door. We all experience the fatigue, the mental battles, and the physical strain that come with training. What separates runners from non-runners isn’t that it’s easier for us, but that we do it anyway. And also, for...
Post a Comment
Read more